I have this co-worker who claims to have sleep apnea. He’s a real asshole despite his claims. So, when asshole falls asleep on the job, I call “bullshit”! He’s been doing this for a few years now; napping between calls, while customers are on hold, etc. Well today, the shit he pulled shocked the shit out of me. For the next 6 months to a year, I will be playing supervisor. It’s not a real promotion and I don’t want on in the field I’m in. It’s too cut throat when you don’t have union backing. I was doing floor support and he came to my desk to ask me to help him out with a simple order.
You see, a lot of my co-workers have seem to lost their minds and forgotten basic training like how to give a customer credit and, with the new systems, how to disconnect a certain portion of the customer’s service. You don’t need a degree to do these task. My 10 year old daughter can do them.
But I digress.
He asked me for help with an order but how he ask, you would have sworn his ass was drunk. Since he was slurring his speech, I had to get up to go to his desk to understand what he wanted to do. Oh! Disconnect XYZ. I got cha! So, I start walking him through the order and, when I got to a certain part, I told him to do something and he didn’t move. I repeated myself and still no response. I bent down to look at him and that negro had the nerve to be sleep. Are my instructions to simplistic for him to pay attention? So, I turn to talk to one of my other co-workers that sit next to his ass and whisper to her about his sleeping ass. She goes on to tell me how he got pissed off at a customer because she hung up after being on hold waiting for his sleeping ass to wake up. Good thing the customer didn’t know he was asleep. Anyway, he wakes up as if nothing happened and starts talking. I go back over to him to finish helping him and, after a few more instructions, his ass goes to sleep again. This time, I complete my conversation with the other co-worker and then leave. Now you’ll probably thinking that I was giving him a novel. Much like this post. But nooooooo! “Click, right click, scroll to delete and complete” doesn’t take that long, but between the “right click” and “complete”, homie fell asleep twice. I told my other pseudo supervisors that his ass doesn’t have sleep apnea. He’s narcoleptic!
But the fun doesn’t stop there. He then IM’s someone on my team to ask if there was a number to the superintendent of our department. Mind you, we don’t have a superintendent. This ain’t fucking school!
The really messed up part about this joke, he acts like his shit don’t stink but he’s dumb as hell. He swears he’s mackin’ but he’s slackin’. I guess he’d be a nice looking guy if his attitude didn’t suck. No one likes him and we’re all surprised his ass still has a job. Not because of his stupidness, but because he’s always sleeping on the job. How the hell are you going to sleep while talking to a screaming customer?!? I’d hate to be his woman. Damn!
